A forum for discussing and organizing recreational softball and baseball games and leagues in the greater Halifax area.
I love DnD
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The other day my Costco food court order was Order 66. My spouse didn't get it until we got to the car so I had to hold in my jokes for however long it takes to make 3 hotdogs.
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See, that's just idiocy. Sure, *test* the device to see if it suddenly gives you spiffy new armor, but ya'll are freaking adventurers, ready to cut and kill and slay anything in your path! SET UP A TRAP FIRST! Put a hot tub of holy water where the first spawn location was! Scatter circles of salt in eighteen strategic locations around the room! Write the verses of ancient positive energy across the walls! Summon the ancient daedra of yore, hallowed be their sigilic runes, and let fly the chaos of the universe into the demesnes of horror where cometh light's foe, wherein the bane of life finds new fears etched prebirth into the slaverings of its blasphemous mental cavity!See, he _could_ have gone about things the smart way, but this was way funnier and made for a better story. It was also 100% in-character for him to do something like that - the guild he was a part of was commonly mocked in-universe for thinking with their swords rather than their brains. Plus I was able to hold it over his head for _years_ afterwards. I was a cleric and he didn't even let me do the bare minimum preparations that might have let us survive before summoning them.
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Fuck that, own your freak! Next time call it out in your best Palpatine impression. Those who get weirded out weren't worth caring about and you never know what other awesome folks you'll see. Make your day and someone elses <3
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> SET UP A TRAP FIRST! The mentality that separates an "Oops, we screwed up" PC group versus an "Oops, I screwed up" DM. The goofy party will stumble around slapping every button in the fun-house, just to see what happens. The pro-gamer move party will key in on "Unlimited Resource" and turn the Generate-A-Spectre button into a steam engine.> The pro-gamer move party will key in on "Unlimited Resource" and turn the Generate-A-Spectre button into a steam engine. A good DM would realize they can have the theoretically "Unlimited Resource" run out between 5-10 uses
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> SET UP A TRAP FIRST! The mentality that separates an "Oops, we screwed up" PC group versus an "Oops, I screwed up" DM. The goofy party will stumble around slapping every button in the fun-house, just to see what happens. The pro-gamer move party will key in on "Unlimited Resource" and turn the Generate-A-Spectre button into a steam engine.
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In an online game I used to play, we were infiltrating deep in necromancer territory and encountered a rune on the floor that would summon an incredibly strong undead specter when a player touched it. One of the players wondered if there was a cooldown between summons, and decided to test this by pressing the rune several times in quick succession. One total party kill later, I can confidently state that there was _not_ in fact a cooldown, and that three nightshades will kill your entire group faster than you can run away.
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In an online game I used to play, we were infiltrating deep in necromancer territory and encountered a rune on the floor that would summon an incredibly strong undead specter when a player touched it. One of the players wondered if there was a cooldown between summons, and decided to test this by pressing the rune several times in quick succession. One total party kill later, I can confidently state that there was _not_ in fact a cooldown, and that three nightshades will kill your entire group faster than you can run away.Take that rune, put it in a portable hole, build a clockwork or magical button-pressing machine, unleash chaos and destruction on demand. That trap's gotta be worth a million gold pieces.
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There's always a relevant xkcd.Relevant: https://www.xkcd.com/404/
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Relevant: https://www.xkcd.com/404/
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The joke is that XKCD #404 is a literal HTTP 404 error.
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https://xkcd.com/242/At D&D last night we were playing a module with an orb on a pedestal that shocked you if you touched it with anything more than single finger. The blue dragonborn touched it about 5 times, taking (half) lightning damage each time. Apparently he was a scientist this whole time.
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So, one day my college group is doing a dungeon. In the middle of the dungeon there's this [giant ass bell.](https://media1.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPTc5MGI3NjExZHNnb3QzbGkyeHc5bHRoOGYzamxic3RqZWxrdXRpdWI0NWhvM3I4NSZlcD12MV9pbnRlcm5hbF9naWZfYnlfaWQmY3Q9Zw/IDGNYvFLkJKLK/giphy.gif) Don't ring it. We're not ringing the bell. We get through the dungeon, we succeeded, everyone is giving props... and one of our guys "I ring the bell." I forget exactly what all hell it spawned, but it was nearly a party wipe. The next year we as a group we go to the local renaissance fair. They had one of the things where if you pay them, a group of guards with halberds will follow you, arrest a friend, bring them back to a cage where they have to do something stupid to get out. They wouldn't go into stores because they didn't want to interrupt selling, but they'd wait outside and you pat the shoulder of the person you're wanting arrested. They even had a checklist of "crimes" they committed. I checked EVERY crime naturally... and at the end there was the other... So I find my friend in a store, walk in, hand on shoulder asking if he found anything, nope, okay, wander on. Then as he steps out the guards are there "*FRIENDS NAME* By the Royal Decree of his Majesty you are under arrest!" and surround him on all four sides and walk him back. The whole time he is *CONFUSED* as are the rest of my friends. There's a lot of "what is going on?" When he gets to the cage and they put him inside, the herald there then reads off the list of his crimes. It was a list... and the whole time my friend was so confused... right until the end "And for ringing the damned bell!" The expression he gave me along with the "YOU!" when he heard it is the sort of thing that soothes my soul every time I remember it.
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So, one day my college group is doing a dungeon. In the middle of the dungeon there's this [giant ass bell.](https://media1.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPTc5MGI3NjExZHNnb3QzbGkyeHc5bHRoOGYzamxic3RqZWxrdXRpdWI0NWhvM3I4NSZlcD12MV9pbnRlcm5hbF9naWZfYnlfaWQmY3Q9Zw/IDGNYvFLkJKLK/giphy.gif) Don't ring it. We're not ringing the bell. We get through the dungeon, we succeeded, everyone is giving props... and one of our guys "I ring the bell." I forget exactly what all hell it spawned, but it was nearly a party wipe. The next year we as a group we go to the local renaissance fair. They had one of the things where if you pay them, a group of guards with halberds will follow you, arrest a friend, bring them back to a cage where they have to do something stupid to get out. They wouldn't go into stores because they didn't want to interrupt selling, but they'd wait outside and you pat the shoulder of the person you're wanting arrested. They even had a checklist of "crimes" they committed. I checked EVERY crime naturally... and at the end there was the other... So I find my friend in a store, walk in, hand on shoulder asking if he found anything, nope, okay, wander on. Then as he steps out the guards are there "*FRIENDS NAME* By the Royal Decree of his Majesty you are under arrest!" and surround him on all four sides and walk him back. The whole time he is *CONFUSED* as are the rest of my friends. There's a lot of "what is going on?" When he gets to the cage and they put him inside, the herald there then reads off the list of his crimes. It was a list... and the whole time my friend was so confused... right until the end "And for ringing the damned bell!" The expression he gave me along with the "YOU!" when he heard it is the sort of thing that soothes my soul every time I remember it.> giant ass bell https://xkcd.com/37
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> giant ass bell https://xkcd.com/37
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> giant ass bell https://xkcd.com/37
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Fuck that, own your freak! Next time call it out in your best Palpatine impression. Those who get weirded out weren't worth caring about and you never know what other awesome folks you'll see. Make your day and someone elses <3
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