I wish there were a socially acceptable way to tell people that one has problems picking up subtle social cues, hints etc.
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I wish there were a socially acceptable way to tell people that one has problems picking up subtle social cues, hints etc.
With most people I know well and get on with they eventually tell me something like “when I first met you I thought you hated me” or “I thought you were trying to make me look bad by correcting me”
I don’t let this feedback just wash over me. Project “Less Obnoxious! more Approachable!” has been ongoing for decades. But, even still I can’t read minds.
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I wish there were a socially acceptable way to tell people that one has problems picking up subtle social cues, hints etc.
With most people I know well and get on with they eventually tell me something like “when I first met you I thought you hated me” or “I thought you were trying to make me look bad by correcting me”
I don’t let this feedback just wash over me. Project “Less Obnoxious! more Approachable!” has been ongoing for decades. But, even still I can’t read minds.
It’s especially frustrating when I discover someone thinks I’m doing something socially advanced and devious. I’m just struggling to seem normal, buddy. I don’t have the time, or the understanding of people required to plot anything against you. Just tell me what’s annoying. I do not know. Please just tell me. People are terrifying and inscrutable and I don’t want to be one of them in your life.
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F myrmepropagandist shared this topic
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It’s especially frustrating when I discover someone thinks I’m doing something socially advanced and devious. I’m just struggling to seem normal, buddy. I don’t have the time, or the understanding of people required to plot anything against you. Just tell me what’s annoying. I do not know. Please just tell me. People are terrifying and inscrutable and I don’t want to be one of them in your life.
@futurebird Same. People often think I'm engaged in some sort 3d chess socially. That I've got some hidden agenda. I'm literally doing exactly what I said I would do. I'm not trying to trick or manipulate anyone.
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It’s especially frustrating when I discover someone thinks I’m doing something socially advanced and devious. I’m just struggling to seem normal, buddy. I don’t have the time, or the understanding of people required to plot anything against you. Just tell me what’s annoying. I do not know. Please just tell me. People are terrifying and inscrutable and I don’t want to be one of them in your life.
@futurebird I only know you via Mastodon here, but FWIW you've always come across as 'normal' to me.
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@futurebird Same. People often think I'm engaged in some sort 3d chess socially. That I've got some hidden agenda. I'm literally doing exactly what I said I would do. I'm not trying to trick or manipulate anyone.
@arrrg When I find out some of the things people think I’m up to I’m horrified for a moment thinking about all of the intrigue I must be missing. But, then the fully taxing task of just interacting on a basic level drives all such concerns from my mind. #1 greet the person and say their name. #2 look at them to see how they are, ask about it #3 carefully listen to how they respond, think about if this is new, respond #4 tell them about ants
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@futurebird I only know you via Mastodon here, but FWIW you've always come across as 'normal' to me.
@SKleefeld I love interacting via text. It’s so much easier than talking— I can re-read what people say and think about it. I can take all the time I want to respond. I often text my friends when they are in the same room and there are two conversations. The text one is higher quality IMO.
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It’s especially frustrating when I discover someone thinks I’m doing something socially advanced and devious. I’m just struggling to seem normal, buddy. I don’t have the time, or the understanding of people required to plot anything against you. Just tell me what’s annoying. I do not know. Please just tell me. People are terrifying and inscrutable and I don’t want to be one of them in your life.
No it is just a fact that when I don't understand people it is to deliberately make them furious with me.
That is the only possible reason because everybody wants that, right? People are so clever when they suss my agenda to be universally hated, no sir they aren't fools.
