Worker ants have three grandparents, not four. This is because male ants have a mother... but no father. They are haploid clones of their mom.

Ant "boy mom" instagram must be SO TOXIC. Can you imagine?

Alternately, maybe this whole "boy mom" thing is some haploidipoly nonsense. Yes. Those weird "instagram moms" are wasps. Explains everything.

I feel like I should explain what an "instagram boy mom" is... but it's one of those disappointing trends that I was sad to learn about so... IDK if you don't know what it is yet that could be a good thing for you. It's like the whole "trad wife" trend in some ways.

@futurebird

oh, the people who do not know what it is definitely don't need to know. It is so silly and sad and infuriating. Suffice it to say: it is another example of how patriarchy hurts everyone and is also upheld by women.

@fritzoids

Ha ha ha I'm a boy mom that's why I DON'T teach my sons to clean up after themselves, feed themselves or to be polite. Ha ha.

Oh no I'm so exhausted. Look at how my house is trashed. This is kinda stressful. But only boys moms will understand! It can't be the consequence of my own actions, it's just how boys are I guess.

@futurebird @fritzoids

The other part that bothers me is that there are a lot of things that all children do that get coded as gendered so they get suppressed in some kids and encouraged in others when they really should be encouraged for all.

Playing with dolls and climbing things, for instance.

@gbargoud @fritzoids

Kids will go to extraordinary lengths to try to meet your expectations. So, its worth thinking about if what you expect will serve them well in life, if it will stress them out, if it will be good for them.

I expect EVERYONE to clean up after themselves if they are able to do so.

I've known many adult men who couldn't cook for themselves, or adult women who couldn't ... use tools. It's really limiting and bad. Why do this to people?

@futurebird @gbargoud

the list is long.
cleaning, cooking, washing clothes, being able to navigate a grocery store, being able to choose your own clothes (at the store and from your closet), minor repairs around the house, how to talk to handymen, booking an appointment, asking for help, dealing with disappointment, caring for others (old, young, sick). Not all at once, but as they get older they gradually get to not just watch but also do things at first with help and later on their own.

@fritzoids @futurebird @gbargoud my ex washed dishes for me a grand total of twice in all our years together. And both times I was mad at him for unrelated reasons.

And both times I had to rewash them because, quote:

I've never lived in a place without a dishwasher.

That's a totally legit excuse for thinking a plate that's still half covered in dried on ketchup is "clean".