Dear DMs: if you take yourself too seriously, I will murder you.

I've had a lot of DND players, often people that exclusively play DND, tell me they like it that way. They like that there's basically no rules for conflict outside of combat. "Just talk it out" and "we're here to *role play* stop looking at your sheet". Personally, not my taste. If we're just going to "talk it out" I feel like we should write a book instead. That or actually rip out the stunted social rules in DND. That would help the annoying thing where the real life Sales Guy brings his whole personality into his 8 Cha Fighter. But I also think a lot of those people have never really played anything else, and like dnd's "barely any rules" better than whatever fantasy they're imagining. I like that games with working social rules can let someone who's shy or quiet play someone socially powerful, just like a physically weak person can play a strong barbarian.

Rogue is worse. I played a rogue for a while and it didn't really deliver a great experience. Every combat was "I shoot, move, cunning action hide". Scouting was largely outclassed by the wizard's familiar, and even more so the pact of the chain familiar. Splitting the party is tedious and risky. One GM tried to make a system to abstract scouting- you'd make some checks and get information and maybe trouble. But that guy liked PbtA way more than me, and it clearly influenced his design, because pretty much every time you used this system something bad would happen. I don't play these games to be a fuck up. I want to be exceedingly competent in my niche. I guess some of that is up to individual GM style, but I think some of it is on the system itself.

What are you going to do, fart on them?

I would let you, but only as a lawful good peace cleric

Suggestion can be twinned if need be

The people who want to do 1500 dmg/turn probably want to be playing 3.5

Way better as an npc. There is no man straight enough to straighten out a campaign with daily Armpits Esquire. She’s the cherry on the top of the cherry on top of the cherry on top of the sundae

give them stage 3 pink eye

Doctor Farts: ooo! i leveled up and got cloudkill!

Unless your DM is a stickler for the updated 2024 rules, then in that case it can't, because they changed Twinned Spell to require that the spell let you target additional creatures when cast at higher levels, which Suggestion does not.

A significant part of the culture that has formed around 5e is about "having it all". And usually by ignoring the (admittedly weak) rules that do exist, rather than exploiting actual gaps. So, you can frankenstein together a caster that has martial proficiency in armour (or even melee weapons), with the only compromise being your capstone abilities (which often are very expendable). And then you can metagame away your shitty social abilities by "roleplaying". I'm not going to defend 5e -- I genuinely think it's a poorly made game, and place the blame for that entirely on the execuitives -- but the reason why so many people refuse to try something else is because they like the exploits that they *believe* exist, even though they are totally socially constructed.

Beyond disappointed that none of our resident fart accounts have commented in this thread. Clearly the clarion call of the wind broken by the fart golems haven't yet echoed deep enough into the halls of lemmy to reach their noses. @Fartswithanaccent@lemmy.world @Fartographer@lemmy.world @I_fart_glitter@lemmy.world @Satansmaggotycumfart@lemmy.world

Am definitely surprised by I_Fart_Glitter considering I know them personally lol

That’s it, your character is now wearing the magical plug of deflated bloating. It gives the wearer permanent relief from meteorism at the cost of -15 agility

My old Dm Used to occasionally run a game where everyone rolled a pc that could fit into a cartoon show, and every game was an episode of this cartoon show. I played an anime inspired character that could turn into a robot for no reason that was ever explained, and sometimes he gained the ability to turn into different kind of robots. The character never shut up about the power of friendship, and had an ever-evolving backstory that made less and less sense as we played more one shots, including: 1. He was his own father somehow 2. he had to go go to the future to make this happen for some reason 3. he was searching for his sibling so that he could stop him from becoming him. His sibling was from the future and had travelled back to the past 4. he could telepathically communicate with plants using the power of friendship. The plants had nothing to say because they were plants 5. his father was some kind of evil god. Somehow he was still his own father. The ontradiction was never explained at all There were more details I can't recall.

Hey don’t leave out my name sibling @FartSparkles@lemmy.world

Some may not like it but this is what the perfect campaign looks like

Ah, but you also know that much as I would like to, I have no experience with RPGs. I’m intimidated by all the rules and details and worry that an old, though sparkly fart like me would fair as well as a boomer trying a smart phone for the first time. ‍️

Who can murder someone with a PC this excellent? > Professor Belvedere “Fartsparkles” Tinkletuft was once a respected lecturer at the Neverwinter Arcane Academy. His groundbreaking research into “transmogrified odoriferous manifestations” (or, as the students called it, fart magic) was dismissed as childish and “in poor taste.” > > In protest, the Professor vowed to prove that flatulence is the ultimate illusion. Through alchemical experimentation, he discovered how to weaponize his digestive essence into arcane displays — clouds of glittering gas, illusionary stink beasts, and even gaseous duplicates of himself. > > Now he roams the realms, performing “scientific demonstrations” and occasionally saving the world — usually by accident.