If you had a matter synthesizer, that could make realistic rocks of any possible description and you wanted to prank a geologist into silence what would you ask it to print?
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If you had a matter synthesizer, that could make realistic rocks of any possible description and you wanted to prank a geologist into silence what would you ask it to print?
It WILL fool them even if they test it.
Why am I asking?
Oh... no reason.
@futurebird a billions of years old rock with this thin line of plastics and other synthetic materials running through it
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If you had a matter synthesizer, that could make realistic rocks of any possible description and you wanted to prank a geologist into silence what would you ask it to print?
It WILL fool them even if they test it.
Why am I asking?
Oh... no reason.
@futurebird I think some plain silicate rock that dates back millions of years, but with an embedded internal structure of epitaxially grown layered crystals ordered with such order it could only be synthetic.
That’s the best I can do.
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If you had a matter synthesizer, that could make realistic rocks of any possible description and you wanted to prank a geologist into silence what would you ask it to print?
It WILL fool them even if they test it.
Why am I asking?
Oh... no reason.
@futurebird all I know is you should never take a gneiss rock for granite
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If you had a matter synthesizer, that could make realistic rocks of any possible description and you wanted to prank a geologist into silence what would you ask it to print?
It WILL fool them even if they test it.
Why am I asking?
Oh... no reason.
@futurebird This is completely a tangent, but I hadn't heard this story before:
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@futurebird You... you just got a matter synthesizer and the first thing you do with it is make rocks for pranks?
@nazokiyoubinbou @futurebird It's so sweet that that's her first thought.
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If you had a matter synthesizer, that could make realistic rocks of any possible description and you wanted to prank a geologist into silence what would you ask it to print?
It WILL fool them even if they test it.
Why am I asking?
Oh... no reason.
@futurebird fully intact fossil of a human skull embedded deep in ancient gneiss with zero evidence whatsoever of any of the other bones
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If you had a matter synthesizer, that could make realistic rocks of any possible description and you wanted to prank a geologist into silence what would you ask it to print?
It WILL fool them even if they test it.
Why am I asking?
Oh... no reason.
@futurebird fossils with the wrong chirality
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If you had a matter synthesizer, that could make realistic rocks of any possible description and you wanted to prank a geologist into silence what would you ask it to print?
It WILL fool them even if they test it.
Why am I asking?
Oh... no reason.
@futurebird the Horta
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@nazokiyoubinbou @futurebird It's so sweet that that's her first thought.
@michaelgemar @futurebird Yes, I agree. And I'm boring that my first thought is "oh I'm so getting rich off this thing!"
But also, now I'm disappointed that it's not real. I've clearly been pranked.
(Also I meant all this in good fun. I hope that was clear.)
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If you had a matter synthesizer, that could make realistic rocks of any possible description and you wanted to prank a geologist into silence what would you ask it to print?
It WILL fool them even if they test it.
Why am I asking?
Oh... no reason.
@futurebird I'd double-down on a classic hoax, and embed a 1920s Champion spark plug in a solid piece of clear quartz after inscribing on it a message that would upset Young Earth Creationists and the Ancient Astronaut believers.
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If you had a matter synthesizer, that could make realistic rocks of any possible description and you wanted to prank a geologist into silence what would you ask it to print?
It WILL fool them even if they test it.
Why am I asking?
Oh... no reason.
-
If you had a matter synthesizer, that could make realistic rocks of any possible description and you wanted to prank a geologist into silence what would you ask it to print?
It WILL fool them even if they test it.
Why am I asking?
Oh... no reason.
@futurebird a fossil in granite
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If you had a matter synthesizer, that could make realistic rocks of any possible description and you wanted to prank a geologist into silence what would you ask it to print?
It WILL fool them even if they test it.
Why am I asking?
Oh... no reason.
@futurebird something that looks like basalt but flakes like mica
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@futurebird The post says "if you had a matter synthesizer" so it's just like you could be creating gold bars or food or something, but you're pranking geologists instead.
Look, all I'm saying is let me use it for a while, then you can have it back.
@nazokiyoubinbou @futurebird gold bars are rocks that somebody took all the interesting texture off of by melting them
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If you had a matter synthesizer, that could make realistic rocks of any possible description and you wanted to prank a geologist into silence what would you ask it to print?
It WILL fool them even if they test it.
Why am I asking?
Oh... no reason.
@futurebird A pleiosaur fossil. Carrying a placard reading "stop nuclear testing now".
(source: Terry Pratchett, of course)
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@futurebird small boulder the size of a large boulder
@c0dec0dec0de @futurebird AHAHAHAHA YES
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Now we're talking!
A sedimentary rock with the potassium isotope signature of the proto earth?
Geologists discover the first evidence of 4.5-billion-year-old “proto Earth”
Scientists have discovered extremely rare remnants of “proto Earth,” which formed about 4.5 billion years ago, before a colossal impact irreversibly altered the primitive planet’s composition and produced Earth as we know today. Their findings will help scientists piece together the primordial starting ingredients that forged early Earth and the solar system.
MIT News | Massachusetts Institute of Technology (news.mit.edu)
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@c0dec0dec0de @futurebird AHAHAHAHA YES
@catmisgivings @futurebird their science can’t explain that
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@nazokiyoubinbou @futurebird gold bars are rocks that somebody took all the interesting texture off of by melting them
@ireneista @futurebird I bet gold bars have an interesting texture all on their own.
Feel free to prove me wrong. But there's only one way to do it...

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@ireneista @futurebird I bet gold bars have an interesting texture all on their own.
Feel free to prove me wrong. But there's only one way to do it...

@nazokiyoubinbou @futurebird it's the texture of the sand they were cast in. there's history to it but it's human history... not like the unmodified rock, whose history is far older

dunno why we're taking a stand on this lol, please don't take us too seriously