Aw, they care about my history

Thank you for the detailed answer! I played Pathfinder for a few sessions, but didn't care much for the combat system. I tend to favor conditions over hitpoints these days, and from what I recall Pathfinder was very A+B-C. "Wounded-Dying-Dead" systems are a bit too simplified, but I find around 15 hp to be the maximum I enjoy tracking. Fate looks interesting for sure. It isn't what is was looking for, but the quick rules' overview I just watched was very intriguing. I might try to find a session to watch to get a better idea of how the system plays out. Now Chronicles of Darkness... is not the medieval-fantasy setting I was looking for, but the system hits all the right spots. Around 10hp max, but with pretty much "wounded-dying-dead" superimposed - 9 attributes which combine to give various sub-stats - enough skills to cover basic situations, but room for specialisation as you see fit - rolling lots of dice for epic situations, but counting them fairly simply - and role playing elements integrated into the system through vices and virtues. From what I quickly watched, I love it. I might try to adapt it to medieval fantasy, or just play a a short campaign in the intended world to get a feel for it. Really cool any way, thanks again.

Not with that attitude. When I dm id accept some uhm-ing, erm-ing fumbling players as buttery smooth talkers if they have the rolls.

Oof. That's definitely not how it should go. But GMing isn't something the rulebook is all that good at teaching people how to do, so stuff like this is quite common

Blades in the dark and other forged in the dark systems are famous for being an early breakout in RPG game design. I've run a blades in the dark campaign and it was awesome. Check out the YouTube channel "Quinns Quest" and I'm confident you can comfortably try any game he has reviewed to get a better roleplaying experience than D&D.

"Incredibly, despite the cringe, it works!" They can still have a dig and throw a little shade, but the game is as the game does. When playing checkers and you say "King me" they dont refuse to do it because you didnt do a flourish.

So...you go to bed with them if they roll a 20? Irl?

When the DM makes that face, they already know that outcome. The rest is just for fun.

That sucks. I love when my players rp something terrible but roll great. player: "I seduce the kobold bartender by telling her I like the thickness of her musk? :: 20+8 in cha bonuses :: Dm: "She drops the glass mug she was washing, staring into your eyes with a startled expression on her face. She doesn't react to the loud shattering of the glass as it hits the floor, she only leans in close and says breathing into your ear as a sharp claw caresses your cheek right under your eye. 'No ones ever talked to me like that before. follow me to my bedroom' dm: roll a perception check :: 2 , no bonuses :: You believe every word she says and follow her up the stairs. Then just let them imagine the worst and decide what happens next session

Well playing dnd is a good low stakes way to improve.

If you want some of that DnDness, I really liked 13th age, and Fanatsycarft. They are on opposite sides of the complexity spectrum. I liked those more than either PF. Ryutama taught me a lot of things about RPGs but a half assed combat system means I can't recommend it., especially for a longer campaign. However if you're interested in something on the experimental side, then I think its perfectly lovely for a one shot. Daggerheart is new, and Im not particularly interested in CR, so I haven't really checked out Daggerheart beyond a cursory scan of the PDF. I enjoyed the heck out of Icon. Exalted is also fun for your fantasy needs. Its a different flavor from dnd though, both mechanically and the kinds of stories they want you to tell. If you're looking for more flexible, open ended stories, fantasy or otherwise, I really liked Fate Accelerated. Thats just if youre looking on the fantasy side of things. On the Sci fi side, Ive been playing Cyberpunk Red and really liking it (although fatigue has yet to set in.) I really liked Shadowrun 4e, and I recommend that to anyone who wants to dip into that (Karmagen optional rule and Chummer.exe are you best friends). Lancer is a heck of a thing.

Old world of Darkness had a few splats in different time periods, including Vampire: the Dark ages, which might suit your needs or give you ideas. You could probably cobble together some kind of Berserk esqe setting.

Do you not?

Well, it was a joke...imagine ducking someone who said something cringe, just because they rolled a 20. I guess who am I to say no?

I mean, my partner of 15 years started as a fling who accidentally lit himself on fire trying to do a party trick before I decided to sleep with him.

How about we get out of here and you cast Magic Mouth on my Great Serpent?

So, did you fix him?

Fix what? He's always been great, haha.

I'm a GURPS fanboy. Complexity is determined entirely by how many rules the GM and players agree to - I've got a player with dozens of skills and several wonky abilities who plays side by side with an 8-skill player. They both do well, and both have what they want - one character is just more detailed than the other. The trick with GURPS is to pull in the bare minimum of rules that you need for the kind of game you want. If you don't like how a rule works? Swap it out! I've enjoyed the Ironsworn line too, for a different feel. That's a much less complicated system that can also be played GM-less, it works narrative elements into the engine - the story dictates how the rules apply!

Unless you are uncomfortable with the situation and it ruins the game for you, sure.