There is something deeply wrong with this country and I think I've found the source. A totem, a moment, and artifact that has poisoned the American psyche since our nation's inception.

I speak of course of "The Mammoth Cheese of Thomas Jefferson."

Basically this "founding father" had a big mansion called Monticello and in it, for a time, he had a big wheel of cheese someone gave to him. It was 1200 lbs. He had a room for it. Made people go look at it.

You had to "view the great cheese"

There is something deeply wrong with this country and I think I've found the source. A totem, a moment, and artifact that has poisoned the American psyche since our nation's inception.

I speak of course of "The Mammoth Cheese of Thomas Jefferson."

Basically this "founding father" had a big mansion called Monticello and in it, for a time, he had a big wheel of cheese someone gave to him. It was 1200 lbs. He had a room for it. Made people go look at it.

You had to "view the great cheese"

@futurebird Look, if I had a 1200lb wheel of cheese, I’d build a room and make people look at it, too.

@futurebird He was a MONSTER!

There is something deeply wrong with this country and I think I've found the source. A totem, a moment, and artifact that has poisoned the American psyche since our nation's inception.

I speak of course of "The Mammoth Cheese of Thomas Jefferson."

Basically this "founding father" had a big mansion called Monticello and in it, for a time, he had a big wheel of cheese someone gave to him. It was 1200 lbs. He had a room for it. Made people go look at it.

You had to "view the great cheese"

On the surface? It sounds charming, right? Harmless. But think again.

No one said "this is too much cheese, this is unseemly, cut it out" they just... went along with it.

Munched on it for months!

No one could question it.

And this is the root of the evil in the soul of this country. We are haunted by the specter of men who'd call their mansion something absurd and needlessly fancy like "Monticello" but then have a big cheese and think it's fine.

And that is my history for the day.

@futurebird

I love this! How have I never heard about this cheese?

"Jefferson's policy to refuse gifts while in office led him on January 4, 1802, to pay Leland $200 for the cheese"

" reported to still be there as late as March of 1804 (at which point it was described as "very far from being good").[9] Apocryphal accounts assert that the last of it was served at a presidential reception in 1805, or that it was dumped in the Potomac at some date unknown"

Mammoth Cheese

In 1801, a Baptist congregation in Cheshire, MA, gifted a"mammoth cheese" to President Thomas Jefferson in honor of his support of religious liberty.

Thomas Jefferson's Monticello (www.monticello.org)

@futurebird Jefferson was also a noted enthusiast for macaroni.

Mac & Cheese was not a common dish at that time, but I'm sure there's a way to connect all the dots.

@ramsey

You see! It's infectious! Insidious.

The secret dark "American Dream"

@futurebird @ramsey More like American Cheese.

On the surface? It sounds charming, right? Harmless. But think again.

No one said "this is too much cheese, this is unseemly, cut it out" they just... went along with it.

Munched on it for months!

No one could question it.

And this is the root of the evil in the soul of this country. We are haunted by the specter of men who'd call their mansion something absurd and needlessly fancy like "Monticello" but then have a big cheese and think it's fine.

And that is my history for the day.

@futurebird I am profoundly uncomfortable with you disparaging cheese like this.

#cheeselife

@corbden @futurebird @ramsey American cheese doesn't come in wheels. It comes in little plastic sleeves. If you had a wheel of American cheese, that really would be impressive.

On the surface? It sounds charming, right? Harmless. But think again.

No one said "this is too much cheese, this is unseemly, cut it out" they just... went along with it.

Munched on it for months!

No one could question it.

And this is the root of the evil in the soul of this country. We are haunted by the specter of men who'd call their mansion something absurd and needlessly fancy like "Monticello" but then have a big cheese and think it's fine.

And that is my history for the day.

@futurebird some day I shall have my own great wheel of cheese
https://www.costco.com/p/-/whole-wheel-parmigiano-reggiano-approximately-80-lbs/100096211

@clayfoot

Look at his joy. He's so happy. Smug even.

This is what cheese will do.

@futurebird @clayfoot There is definitely absolutely a lot of smug pollution coming off of this photograph.

@nazokiyoubinbou @clayfoot

To be fair if I had that much cheese I might look MORE smug.

@clayfoot

Look at his joy. He's so happy. Smug even.

This is what cheese will do.

@futurebird @clayfoot You admit your crime!